The art of "looking in the mirror" or How do we recognize ourselves through others?

Do you think other people can help you discover yourself? I am going to talk here about the so-called "mirror adjustment", you may have heard or experienced something similar on your own.

We all radiate something to our surroundings by our behavior and attitudes (even physical ones). And from the outside, we get the view of ourselves from others. It's like action and reaction. Although not everything is directly related to us. For example, if the person we are talking to has slept badly for the day, then their reaction will be influenced more by fatigue than by our words and gestures.

There are situations where someone deliberately "holds up a mirror" to us to see that we have, for example, crossed someone's boundaries or that they don't like our behavior and why... We often use "mirroring" for children. And I think often to good effect. E.g. "Our child snatches a toy out of another child's hand because he likes it. We tell him to give it back, that he wouldn't like it either if someone took his toy without his permission." We explain everything in an age-proportional manner. But we will use an image of himself and perhaps his favorite toy...

At the same time, our parents can provide us with a "mirror". When we look at ourselves, we see, for example, that we behave like them. Sometimes we notice that we repeat the same mistakes, and sometimes we are grateful for who we are.

I see class reunions as a useful "looking glass". I would say that is one of the reasons I like to attend them. I observe my development in communicating with other people. I used to be very closed, but now I am opening up more to the world around me.

I am surprised to find that the world is more accepting of me if that is my correct impression from "looking in the mirror". You know, you look at yourself in the mirror in the morning to check yourself before leaving the house... but your image is never real, it is sideways... And what about the image in our, let's call it this, for example, "social mirror"? So the perception of others is often distorted, yet their insights can help us to know ourselves better. Even though we have been with ourselves the longest and therefore probably know ourselves the most, we can still surprise ourselves in some situations with our reactions.

I was talking about children here, they too often hold up a mirror to us. We find out what kind of vocabulary we have when our children pick up some of our expressions. We find our boundaries, we are more aware of them than ever in our contact with our children.

But for self-knowledge, I find the most useful "mirror" is looking into the past versus the present. We can also see our perspective in our loved ones, and they give us true feedback because they know us well.

Do you think looking ''in the social mirror'' can be useful? Do you have a personal experience of looking in the mirror that has opened your eyes?